If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
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