**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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