fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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