My room smells like vodka and shame
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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