return my video game
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
