Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
