everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
