This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
