I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
