I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
