just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
