He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
