Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.

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(203): I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt. http://tfl.nu/mij5

Replies (9) Good night (919) Bad night (1163)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.

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(732): I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT. http://tfl.nu/aknw

Replies (44) Good night (4800) Bad night (638)
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(916): View more from California

I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn

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(916): I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn http://tfl.nu/z1in

Replies (4) Good night (3227) Bad night (942)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?

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(814): Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low? http://tfl.nu/5hhv

Replies (29) Good night (996) Bad night (4084)
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(954): View more from Florida

so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral

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(954): so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral http://tfl.nu/k9rx

Replies (31) Good night (4686) Bad night (718)
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(907): View more from Alaska

It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.

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(907): It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am. http://tfl.nu/0rxk

Replies (36) Good night (1172) Bad night (5737)
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(208): View more from Idaho

She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"

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(208): She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!" http://tfl.nu/qjvm

Replies (41) Good night (3027) Bad night (9717)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."

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(307): I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom." http://tfl.nu/5uyu

Replies (20) Good night (4931) Bad night (1901)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.

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(609): promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant. http://tfl.nu/llpo

Replies (5) Good night (2046) Bad night (1503)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.

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(203): it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along. http://tfl.nu/rnt1

Replies (3) Good night (2643) Bad night (742)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.

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(732): Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate. http://tfl.nu/stwp

Replies (9) Good night (1643) Bad night (713)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave

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(973): Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave http://tfl.nu/h612

Replies (16) Good night (1714) Bad night (674)
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(530): View more from California

So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"

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(530): So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU" http://tfl.nu/a6ng

Replies (5) Good night (1442) Bad night (573)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I'll be there in a few.

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I'M COUNTING TO FEW.

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(814): I'll be there in a few. (717): I'M COUNTING TO FEW. http://tfl.nu/nvfq

Replies (5) Good night (1099) Bad night (443)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?

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(270): Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with? http://tfl.nu/81ec

Replies (5) Good night (674) Bad night (469)

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