the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
