I looked at my own cervix.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Are my feet made of real feet?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
