Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Randomize
