I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
