Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
