I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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