So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
