I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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