This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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