just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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