We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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