You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
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She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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