if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
