2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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