She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
