dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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