so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
