Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
