i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
