I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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