That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
