Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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