it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
