Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
handjob tips. give me some.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
