she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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