RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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