is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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