it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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