its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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