Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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