Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize