Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize