Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
