they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
