I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize