Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
