we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize