Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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