So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
